They can’t help it. This isn’t an intellectual choice, but an emotional one. The believe they can beat the system, outwit it, by lying to their lawyer
Colin Samuels, a good friend, has won five Blawg Review annual prizes for the exceptional quality of his writing. I had the pleasure of doing an Unsilent Partners collaborative Blawg Review with him and we are now collaborating on the social atrocity satire of George aka West London Man. (Episode 26 is here: West London Man (26): THE ADVENTURE OF THE FINAL PROBLEM)
Colin Samuels writes on his own blog Infamy or Praise. (The service was down this afternoon – hopefully a temporary glitch)
Finally in the US selection: Gideon – A Public Defender
Another good friend and fellow blogger, Antonin Pribetic is an enthusiastic supporter of UK law blogs. His Trial Warrior blog is thoughtful, analytical and incisive – a very enjoyable read. His recent Blawg Review #319 will also give you an insight into his views and thoughts.
And finally… a must read for all interested in Human Rights Law: Cearta.ie (Irish for Rights) written by Dr Eoin O’Dell a Fellow and Senior Lecturer at the School of Law, Trinity College Dublin.
AND really finally… Chef Charon présente…
Originally, I awarded myself 21 stars. But upon reflection and coming to the view that readers would find this preposterous ‘cheffery’ on an industrial scale – I have reduced the number of stars to a more credible 18. Here is a recipe for my ‘famous’ Boeuf Buggerorf
Not that I need a reason for introducing complete nonsense into my UK Blawg Review #10 – but, as it happens, there is a reason…. Nicky Richmond, a property lawyer, writes a very amusing blog about Law and food… well… mainly food – Saying It Straight. The reviews may assist you in deciding where to dine. The writing is wonderful. Most enjoyable. Dip in and read… you won’t regret it: The Arts Club. Do you have to be a member to join?
Time to say goodbye for UK Blawg Review #10. I leave you with two pieces of nonsense wot I knocked up some time back.
I have enjoyed reading and writing about the blogs in parts 1-54. I’m only sorry I can’t cover every UK Blawg. Reading and writing for all Blawg Reviews (US and now UK) I have done takes a fair bit of time. (I often get asked how long blog reviews take. These four parts took just under 24 non-billable hours! – for me – a pleasure.
A Bar & Dining Room
Somewhere in London
Meal for two with wine: £90
Charon goes to a restaurant run by East European border guards?
“Have you booked?” asked the black silk shirted Maitre D’ guarding the entrance. The abruptness of the greeting took me by surprise.
“I have not booked. Do you have a table?” Blackshirt’s eyes narrowed as he flicked open the diary. The page had one entry. Blackshirt looked up, eyes darting. “How many of you are there?” It may seem to the casual observer that I suffer from dissociative identity disorder, but I was alone. I heard Sir Alec Guinness in the recess of my mind: “Charon” he said, “Use the Force….”
“I am one.”
The Maitre D’ surveyed the dining room. It was that sort of place… Not a restaurant, but a Bar and Dining Room. It was 12.30. Only two tables were occupied. “Do you smoke?” Blackshirt snapped.
“For England.” I replied.
I was escorted to a table in the corner of the room – a table for two. An East European border guard, dressed as a waitress, appeared with a menu. I selected a bottle of Claret and asked for two espressos and a glass of tap water, no ice. “You want espresso?” the waitress asked, unsmiling. “Now?”
“Yes please.” I watched her walk towards the bar. Well it was more of a march… more Red Square than Sandhurst. I was not invited to taste the wine when it arrived.
The menu was fairly typical of many gastros – a mix of “Confu**tion cooking” with a bit of thai/vietnamese nonsense thrown in. I enjoy reading Anthony Bourdain… but his books, do on occasion, get into the wrong hands… and so it was, today. Couscous and polenta featured heavily. One day I am sure that I will find a gastro pub with a dish called “Irish tagine”.
A couple were seated at a table nearby – both late twenties, both City professionals. I know this because they managed to tell me, indirectly, by relating events to each other of their successes during the week. They talked at each other; he admiring himself repeatedly in the mirrors lining the walls on our side of the restaurant. They obviously knew each other well – at least one assumes so, because, later, declining the offer of pudding, they started eating each other.
I have no idea why nutters on trains, tubes, buses and restaurants gravitate towards me – but it happend again today. The East European border guard escorted another customer to the adjacent table – a man in his early sixties, blazered, highly polished Oxford shoes, grey trousers, Turnbull & Asser shirt, silk tie and a traditional ‘British’ haircut. One could almost smell the George Trumper cologne.
“Good day to you.”
“And to you.” I replied.
“Writer?” the man asked, pointing at my laptop. I learned long ago not to answer that question.
“Just doing a bit of surfing.”
“Surfing Eh?…. yes… I used to surf when I was a junior partner with X&Y in Hong Kong…. on trips to Australia…. tied up a few M&A deals, I can tell you… out there…. those were the days…”
God in heaven. I know I drank a bottle of cider in Church once when I was at Prep school… but I had no idea, then, that I would continue to be punished for that sin nearly 40 odd years later on Easter Sunday 2007… in the form of a retired City lawyer, from the days of Tai Pan, sitting at the next table.
“Really…? good stuff.. ” I replied, affably, but with what I hoped was the correct tone to indicate that I wished ‘to be alone’. It was too late to pretend I was Bulgarian and could not speak English.
So there I was… a couple of young professionals, but a few tables away, talking at each other and Mr Drone, to my right.
“Been to Church?”
I was looking intently at my laptop screen. The words appeared to come from above. I looked at the ceiling. I looked at my bottle of Claret. I had only had one glass.
“The Vicar had a few of us back for a glass of sherry after the service”
“Yes… quite a few actually. Have to splice the mainbrace after sitting through all that without being able to charge fees at the end of it! ” a statement which provoked so much laughter from the speaker that I was concerned I may have to do a Heimlich manoeuvre on him.
“Oh Yes… Vicar did us a good sermon today…”
Mr Drone told me at length that he would have been in New York to advise on a merger but the US firm had ‘cocked up’ on timing… adding that he liked to take on important cases on a consultancy basis from time to time…
I drained my glass, re-filled and lit a cigarette.
“Smoker Eh?…yes… used to smoke until the Doc said to me ‘My dear chap, unless you pack in the gaspers now you won’t be able to get it up when you are 65′.” Another burst of self satisfied laughter, gave me the opportunity to wave at the waitress and explain to the gentleman seated at the next table that I needed to concentrate on my work. He made a curious signal, tapping his finger against his nose and said “Got it…Roger… mustn’t stop a chap from his work “
“You are ready with your orders?”
I smiled at the waitress, trying not to look as if I had something to declare, and ordered a main course. I justified my lack of a first course, when questioned, by explaining that I may have a pudding. She seemed satisfied with my explanation and marched off.
It takes a rare talent to cook roast lamb badly, but only inhalation of super strength cannabis would suggest beetroot risotto and chilli jam is a sensible, or even suitable, accompaniment to lamb. The waitress looked at my plate, barely touched. The lemon meringue pie had the merit of being bought in. The wine was more than drinkable and, after negotiating my release without the aid of the Foreign Office, I returned to familiar surroundings.
I often listen to The Shipping Forecast on Radio 4 before heading for sleep. Here is my Drinking Forecast, complete with ‘Drinking By’
listen (3-4 mins)
Well.. there we are. Fin. Adios for now…
Part 1 of UK Blawg Review #10 is below and linked here
Part 2 of UK Blawg Review #10 is here
Part 3 of UK Blawg Review #10 is here
I am delighted to be hosting #10 of the UK Blawg Review roundup