F**kArt: Assertive Banana

I was a bit irritated this morning after phoning five accounts departments to see why they hadn’t dealt with my invoices as requested.  Two didn’t even have the invoice.  One said that the department had my invoice but had forgotten to deal with it and two of the departments were in India.  Dealing with accounts departments in India – outsourcing they call it – is wonderful for the organisation’s cashflow.  For the supplier who expects to be paid it is sheer hell dealing with them.  I gave up and reached into my fruit bowl for a banana.

It was at this point, as I peeled the banana, that I thought to myself…“If this banana could speak… what would it have said to the accounts departments?”  It was but a short leap to get my clay and paints out and make a talking banana.

What would the talking banana have said?   I can tell you… it would have said this….

“Get your farkin ass in gear and pay the man…. or the other bananas get it….Capische?!!”

4 thoughts on “F**kArt: Assertive Banana

  1. OMG – Charon in “He’s got a fruit bowl” shock.

    An empty Rioja bottle for an ashtray or an empty Ocado delivery crate for your Marlboro’s I could take – but a fruit bowl? Are you going soft man?!?

  2. i’d read that blog!!!

    maybe AB could stand for head of the bar council. or run a law school – i hear that pays.

    ‘Assertive Banana College – we make law as simple as ABC!’
    (can i be papaya in charge of marketing, please?)

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