West London Man (11): Biscuits

Audio Version: West London Man (11): Biscuits…

Friday 6.00 pm: George calls Hugo his friend who works for a City Law Firm. Caroline has called to say that she is going out for drinks with an old friend and that her mother is looking after the children for the evening.

***

Ring… ring…. ring…. ring

Hugo: Hello

George: Hugo,  it’s George.

Hugo: Hello, George what can I do you for this late on a Friday afternoon?

George: What sort of biscuits does your firm serve up to clients at meetings?

Hugo: What sort of biscuits? I’ve know idea… why? Have you started on the sherbert a bit early?

George: One of our compliance guys is a lawyer. He read on Rollonfriday that there has been a survey of what biscuits City firms have served up. I’ll quote from the report: “The quality of a firm’s biscuits are the key to its success….. A poll of 1,000 business people by Holiday Inn has found that lawyers are the professionals most likely to be impressed by a decent selection of biscuits. 80% of those who were quizzed said that the type of biscuit served to clients could have a bearing on the outcome of a deal, and chocolate digestives are apparently the top choice. Hob Nobs and Jammy Dodgers also did well.”

Hugo: For Christ’s sake George…. I’m not interesting in F*****g biscuits… is that all you called about?

George: No… of course not. Caroline has gone out tonight with an old friend. Her mother is looking after the children…. just called to see if you fancy a drink. I want to run an idea up the flagpole. We have an elephant in the room over here and I’d like to have a preliminary chat. You can bill an hour and then we have some dinner and the evening is ours.

Hugo: Yes… sure… not a problem. Been here since 6.00 this morning. Meet at The Law Society in Chancery Lane?

George: You’ve got to be joking, Hugo….. nope… let’s go somewhere a little bit more lively. Groucho Club… the doorway with the Duck tiles on the floor. Ask for me at reception and I’ll come out. I’ll be there by 7.00

Hugo: OK. See you at 7.00

***

Audio Version: West London Man (11): Biscuits…

Other episodes of West London Man (Some with audio versions / sound effects / music)

17 thoughts on “West London Man (11): Biscuits

  1. Lol… I have never heard of the expression “run an idea up a flagpole”… thank you for giving me today’s lesson! :D

    Oh, and I love Jammy Dodgers… can we have the ones with smiley faces? ;)

  2. Ms Hansen….
    I chose the pic of the Jammy Dodger with a love heart deliberately – George and Caroline are married….

    One of my favourite corporate expressions (and there are many) is ‘ there is an elephant in the room’… meaning… we have an embarrassment – everyone knows what it is… but no-one ssys anything.

    The story continues… but not tonight. I am off to watch have I got News for You and…. a bit of news and then sleep. Worked and blogged too late last night.

  3. I read about the biscuit thing myself and I was startled to see the absence of chocolate Hob Nobs. Perhaps these business people are missing a trick? Perhaps there’s a consultancy niche for me to sneak into?

    As for George and Caro … it’s a slippery slope, isn’t it? *sigh*

    At least HIGNFY was enjoyable today. Clarkson may be entirely politically incorrect but I do have a soft spot for him.

    Hope you caught up on your sleep – and enjoy your weekend, sir!

  4. HIGNFY was excellent tonight….. I like Clarkson – not the Top Gear nonsense so much – but his book and Times column was always amusing.

    I’m now off to the futon …. perchance to dream

  5. I like organic green tea – it doesnt like me, though (which is unfair, because I have done nothing to it other than drink it!)

  6. My Dear Charon,

    There are indeed many jammy dodgers in legal quarters, but I cannot agree with your assessment of Clarkson.

    You may rememember Roger Mellie from Viz-Clarkson is Mellie incarnate.

    You might want to have a word with lawminx about her green tea habit.

  7. What the ROF article failed to mention (that some reports did pick up on) is that 52% of ‘business professionals’ frown on the practice of dunking.

    As I said elsewhere, I think it’s essential to investigate this from the legal perspective – what percentage of lawyers are in favour of dunking?

    If we are to dunk, can I suggest that Hob Nobs are made the primary biscuit at such meetings?

  8. Scunnered: I think that Cherie may, possibly / allegedly, like something a bit more with a bit of matrix… layers … subtle…. a Jaffa cake…. a bit of orange… like her husband’s new healthily tanned look before the select committee the other day…. and a bit of law about the difference between a biscuit and a cake….

  9. James C: Clarkson is a bit unusual – but he can be very amusing…. No?

    Asp: Dunking a biscuit in tea or coffee is not for me – but if people want to look puzzled at serious meetings when half of their biscuit has fallen into their cup – that is fine by me.

    I may well be talking to Lawminx about her green tea – just a caution this time, mind – provided she agrees to start drinking wine.

  10. James C… thanks for your Clarkson view – my life is draining away – I don’t think about him that often !

    Thanks also for the link to “Equality Control” – have posted today about it…

    Cybil / Andrew – Compliments indeed…. I am thinking about where George and Caroline are going – but having a bit of trouble typing as my right arm seems to be numb!

  11. Pingback: West London Man returns… after a trip to The Reichenbach Falls « Charon QC

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