From the Desk of The Vice Chancellor
I learned from the Independent (Thursday 26 October) that Professor Tony Downes, Vice Chancellor of Reading University, has written a personal letter to all the Bar and Club owners in Reading asking them not to offer cut price drinks to his students.
The professor was concerned about students not turning up to lectures because they had been out binge drinking. No doubt the landlords of Reading will oblige the Prof. Cheers.
And here is an email from another Professor… a bizarre variation on the Nigerian 419 scam…
FROM THE DESK OF PROFESSOR. CHARLES. C. SOLUDO
THE EXECUTIVE GOVERNOR OF CENTRAL BANK (CBN)
HEAD OFFICE ABUJA NIGERIA!
IMMEDIATE CONTRACT PAYMENT. CONTRACT:
We apologies, for the delay of your payment and all the inconveniences and inflict that we might have indulge you through. However, we were having some minor problems with our payment system, which is inexplicable, and have held us stranded and indolent, not having the aspiration to devote our 100% assiduity in accrediting foreign contract Payments. We apologies once again.
From the records of outstanding contractors due for payment with the federal government of Nigeria, your name! and Company was discovered as next on the list of the Outstanding contractors who have not yet received their payments.
I wish to inform you now that the square peg is now in square whole and can be voguish for that your payment has been processed and ready to be deliver to your door step as soon as you respond to this letter. Also note that from my record in my file your outstanding contract payment is us $5,700,000.00 (Ten Million Seven Hundred Thousand United States dollars).
I look forward to receiving payment. Should pay for a few glasses of Rioja… may even make a donation to the Reading Student’s Union… Mind you… I think Professo Charles C. Soludo may have been drinking in every bar and club in Reading judging by his prose and his inability to read numerals…
Not entirely sure why a woman needs 200 pairs of shoes…
Another snippet from The Independent. Apparently, the average woman over 40 owns an average of 19 pairs of shoes but.. and I quote… “It is not uncommon to have more than 100.”
I went to my wardrobe last night to see how many pairs of shoes I had. I found five pairs of black brogues, one pair of brown suede brogues, three pairs of casual docksider style shoes, a pair of chelsea boots (Yes… I was a bit puzzled to find those lurking in the wardrobe) a pair of heavy duty walking boots (even more suprising) and four pairs of motorbike boots. Clearly.. I am a mere amateur in the footwear stakes when compared to the women (the Independent reports) who have over 200 pairs of shoes and boots in their wardrobes.
I also found a pair of very beaten up shoes which I recall rescuing from the dustbin when a former Mrs C decided, some years ago, that they needed to go. It must be a male thing to rescue shoes from the bin?
And finally…. which City firm woos it’s LPC students with booze… over to RollonFriday to find out.